Chapter 1: Discovering Presence

I recently returned from a transformative trip to Italy, and while it may sound like a cliché, it truly was a journey that changed my perspective on life. I didn’t anticipate this revelation, but it unfolded beautifully.

During my time in the enchanting city of Florence, I enjoyed intimate experiences that sparked deep reflection. Stepping away from the hustle and bustle of New York City allowed me to breathe, feel, and truly live.

One memorable night at a local bar, which I frequented with friends, I found myself dancing and DJing the music all night long. It was pure joy—connecting with friends and celebrating life. Despite its simplicity, that night stands out as one of my favorites from the trip.

Reflecting on that evening, I realized something significant: I wasn’t engaging in constant overthinking. Instead, I was simply present in the moment.

What Does It Mean to Be Present?

In our fast-paced world filled with anxiety and the pressures of social media, being present can feel like a daunting task. I certainly struggle with it. When you’re accustomed to worrying about how others perceive you, recognizing your presence becomes challenging. There’s often a nagging voice in your mind, anxious about others or the future.

I’ve attended events where my thoughts were consumed by concerns—arriving late, who would be there, the atmosphere, or even whether my eyeliner was even. When it came time to dance, my mind raced with worries about how others might judge my moves.

However, that night in Italy was different. I vividly recall every detail, but not a single intrusive thought about the future crossed my mind. I didn’t worry if everyone would like my song choices or how my dancing might be perceived. Even in moments of nervousness, I was solely focused on the experience at hand.

If your thoughts are preoccupied with how others view you or the implications of your actions tomorrow, you’re not truly present. Attempting to gauge others' perceptions creates a disconnect, making it feel as though you’re observing yourself from a distance. Instead, immerse yourself fully in the experience. Others around you are likely present and not concerned with judging anyone.

I have a passion for capturing moments through photos and videos, especially as an artist. However, I’ve noticed that the more I document an experience, the less I seem to engage with it. I can recall the details of that fantastic night in Italy, but I have only one picture and a video as evidence of my presence. The best memories are often formed when I’m fully immersed in the moment, without my phone in hand. I love those instances when I get so lost in the night that I momentarily forget about my phone, only realizing it when I check the time.

In our quest for meaningful experiences, we sometimes compensate for a lack of genuine fun by posting curated photos on social media. I’ve been actively trying to take pictures of moments I genuinely want to remember—not just to prove my presence but to capture the essence of those moments. Interestingly, when you’re truly living in the moment, there’s often no need to document it. You’ll feel no urge to validate your experience to others if you genuinely felt it.

Being present is paradoxical; if you find yourself thinking, “I’m totally in the moment right now,” it indicates an analytical mindset that can only happen when the moment has passed. This reflection implies a distance from your experience, as you’re already considering it as a memory rather than living it fully.

When you’re genuinely immersed in the moment, you’ll remember both the highs and lows of your experiences, but it won’t feel like you’re in the process of making a memory. It simply exists, and it becomes a memory only after the experience has ended.

My time in Italy was filled with wonderful moments and stories that I can recount without judgment or the need to prove anything to anyone. I cherish these experiences for helping me understand what it truly means to be present.

Now, I invite you to share your thoughts: How do you recognize when you’ve been fully present in your experiences?

Chapter 2: The Art of Being Present